Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol – boredom on steroids

I noticed how rottentomatoes.com gives this a 93% freshness rating, and that is from critics. I would give it a freshness rating of about 7%.

At the beginning of the first Ice Age movie, if I remember correctly, there is a saber-toothed squirrel that couldn’t seem to get his hands on an acorn. He chases it through a series of death-defying challenges only to have it plucked from his grasp each time. He chases it, and chases it, and chases it, on, and on, and on. Some people find it hilarious. I find it tedious, and very similar to Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol – lots and lots of action, with very little to show for it when the dust settles.

Have you noticed how movies with live actors have become more and more like cartoons? People can now jump from speeding vehicles with no damage whatsoever. They just get up and run away. Head-on collisions? Same thing. Get up and run away. They can fight, and fight, and fight – punching and kicking and smashing, and when it’s over they aren’t limping, or nursing a wound, or even breathing hard. There is no reality left in the paradigm at all – which is what takes all of the fun out of it.

When birds fly thousands of feet in the air without a net, nobody worries about their safety. They are fine up there. Nobody bites their nails in fear for the safety of birds in flight. On the other hand, humans tend to break when they move fast, and stop too quickly. The drama in dramas comes from the dangers humans face. If the paradigm allows characters to do almost anything, with no physical consequences, where is the drama? I can only see someone cheat death so many times in one movie. At some point I stop worrying for their safety and start checking my watch.

This is a Hollywood trend that shows no signs of stopping. Over Thanksgiving holiday I saw the first movie in the Hobbit series, and decided I couldn’t stay interested. The dwarves and their hobbit friend were like diamonds in a blender. No matter how frenetic the scramble, the merry band came out unscathed. Rocks falling in showers over their heads? No problem. The whole group falling from great heights? Crashing through splintered wood platforms? Landing on each other in a pile? No problem. Not even a scratch. They defied death over, and over, and over – in any given 60 seconds worth of film. I couldn’t wait for the movie to end. No more Hobbit movies for me. I’ll stick to books if Hollywood insists on amping up the special effects to cover for a total lack of substance.